Blog – Celebrating My Cancer Dad In My Life

Yesterday was the day of my father’s birthday. I think of him often and I tried in my own way to remember his great gifts that he bestowed upon me that allowed me to become who I am in this life. The greatest teachers in my life have not been those that placated me constantly and told me what I wanted to hear. My greatest teachers have been those that told me the truth, especially when I did not want to hear it.
I love those souls in my life that are the sign of Cancer because it seems their watery insight is exactly what my pompous Leo self needs to hear are critical times. I am grateful that as a Leo, I do not back away from honest reflection. In fact, I honor those that have such courage.
No one wants to hear truth in moments but that truth can be the most critical piece where we shift our approach, our path, our method, or our perspective.
My father was the sign of Cancer and he and I would butt heads often over my chosen ballet career. Or any of my seemingly crazy choices in my life. But I recognize that I needed his strength to push against. I needed to forge my own path and while what he wanted for me and what I wanted for me were radically different, I saw that what he wanted for me was a life with more safety and security. Which is always important for any Cancer (the sign of home, hearth, babies, and stability).
But I wanted a life of adventure, change, expansion, risk, and wildness. And I got all of that.
I loved my father more than anything. I looked up to him in so many ways and his genetics still live in my blood.
He was a great storyteller and so am I. He had great charisma with people and so do I. He could walk in a room and light it up … and I do the same. He had adorable dimples on his cheeks when he smiled and so do I. When I look in the mirror, I see my father’s face, and I am glad that my dad was a very handsome man.
Today, I celebrate all those Cancer’s in my life that have shaped and changed me in all the ways that have mattered the most to me.
And while I did not often do things exactly as they said, I did listen and feel what the deeper intention was in their lives and what they wanted to give to me.
After all, I am a Leo with a Cancer ascendant. I and the Sun and the Moon. I am the embodiment of the light and the shadow. I am bold and intuitive. And I have learned to dance with this duality inside my being in ways that might have astounded my father, but I believe that he would be proud of who I have become.

Thanks dad. I love you.

~Suzanne Wagner~