Add the 1 + 0 + 1 + 2 + 2 + 0 + 2 + 1 = 9.
I describe the archetype for the number 9 as Isis. She is the clear representation of the magic and mystery of the complex culture of the Egyptian mythology. She is the goddess of fertility and abundance. This is the number of the strong feminine principal at work in life. It is the archetype of the Earth Mother.
This is the number that requires us (because of circumstances) to journey deep within and know the self … first.
Going deep within is something that many avoid at all costs. Such a journey requires a type of will to accept and understand the truths that are hidden by our ego as it attempts to make us the hero of our own journey.
Life has moments when it is overwhelming and depressing. Those that avoid the inward journey are often the most hurt and resistant to the truths that arise by such objective observation of our choices and actions.
It is a human failing to want to avoid the emotions that arise. The greatest mystery of all is within each of us.
The positive side of this number allows us to be more creative, artistic, caring, and compassionate. It is the doorway to explore all psychic phenomena, meditation, and creative expression. It can be idealistic but it allows intuitive knowing to be something of value.
In the negative, one can find this moment, depressing, it can make us feel temperamental, and overly dramatic. It also brings about gullibility and mistakes by not reading a situation properly.
The Moon is more grounded in Capricorn and some of those idealistic thoughts from the past few days need to be set aside for more practical concerns.
Tonight, the Moon is going to square the Sun in Libra, making us feel as if we want to do something right now. However, that may not be the best choice. We need to figure out some big things before we jump into the middle of stuff.
It may feel as if the tension is mounting again and there are moments when stress accelerates into very new places. And not pleasant ones.
Our goals and our relationships seem at odds. Expect this to cause imbalances and it will feel as if the pressure is mounting.
Things are progressing but our inner and outer balance seems disturbed.
What will happen if we let those with too much power win?
What will happen if we do not call hate a sin.
We lose a thread that has held us safe and secure.
We abdicate responsibility and embrace manure.
It was a great day yesterday. We biked along the coastal trail past MacKerricher State Park and rode over to the 10 Mile Beach. Then parked the bikes and walked the beach by the dunes.
There was no one there. Totally pristine. Found whole sand dollars and watched the birds dig out their lunch from the rising tide.
I got lots of bike riding in and took many steps for my daily walking in also.
We have so much to be grateful for in this life. Being able to drive to the coast, ride bikes, walk and then make the loop from Willits to Hwy 20, to Fort Bragg, then up the Hwy 1 over to Branscomb Road, up to Laytonville and back home. Such a beautiful drive.
I reflect on my journey of learning to have a life rather than just a career, mission, or purpose.
It has always been easy for me to have the later. But that created a life that was too busy, with no time to connect with friends and family.
There are important things in life that we don’t want to miss. Such as births and deaths that got pushed to the side because of being a ballet dancer.
After all the show must go on.
In my generation, as a dancer, time off was not an easy thing to get. I probably should say, impossible.
I asked only during the deaths of grandparents, or the birthday of my grandfather when he turned 85, and everyone in the family was going to New Jersey to surprise him.
But I was never allowed to go.
It seemed so petty at the time, and it was emotionally devastating to me because I missed funerals, and other important moments that I should have been allowed to experience.
I do not know how it is now, but back then that was the norm.
In many ways, it was the final straw that made me see that I needed another life.
What happened was that I was to perform up at Alta for an event. It only required a few dancers.
Myself being one of them.
But it was my birthday and it was the end of the Mayan Calendar, August 16, 1987. They called it Harmonic Convergence.
It was the first world’s synchronized global peace meditation. And I felt called to be up at Squaw Meadow on Mt. Shasta.
Rarely do I want to do such things but this one felt important and special.
I asked for that weekend off. I was going to drive all night, get there for the meditation, and drive all night home to Utah again. But the answer was, “No!” just as I expected.
And as I was dancing up at altitude, doing my best to connect with all those in the world meditating for peace, something shifted.
It was like a huge light came in and told me that I was complete with this part of my journey. Dancing was not the path that would take me to the next level of my existence.
It was clear as a bell.
And the performance did not go as I wanted. Another sign that something was off.
That somehow decided it. I had no idea what would be next, but I knew that this was not it.
So, in an odd way, Harmonic Convergence worked for me, even though I did not get the picture I wanted.
I still got the insight and understanding that propelled me through a doorway towards learning to have a life.
A real life.
One with magic and moments.
One with love and caring.
One with beauty and wonder.