Numerology/Astrology for 10/5/19 – Plus Personal Blog


Numerology/Astrology for 10/5/19


10/5/19 is the number 9. What can make a person turn around and change? That is always the question. I find there are a few ways it happens. You either have an epiphany and recognize a missing piece of information and that moment allows it to slot into the puzzle of your life. From there you can finally see the whole picture and the choice becomes an easy one to make. Or you have to be in enough pain that you just can’t take it anymore. You recognize that the energy it takes to maintain a false sense of self and ego is depleting your energy and you recognize that you will die if you do not change. The reality is that we all have done both of these, again and again. But notice what is now asking for change. What is now asking you to shift? Then make the choice that causes less suffering and upset. You can allow in epiphanies by being open to feedback. I find that the universe is always talking to me but I am not always listening. Notice the conversations that keep happening and the feedback that you are getting. Notice what someone tells you that you are afraid to let in as truth. Notice the information that you avoid looking at. Notice what is so upsetting that you want to push it away. What we resist is what is often the direction we need to take a look at.

~Suzanne Wagner~


Astrology Today


The Moon continues in Capricorn for the weekend, indicating that your focus should be on the practical matters so you can accomplish something tangible. Be prepared because you might need to help someone. Just to remember to have healthy boundaries. We are at a half Moon that that adds complications and challenges as you move forward with something.

The Moon in Capricorn conjunction Saturn. This indicates restrictions and a feeling that you have reservations on many things. Feelings are all over the place and your state of mind is feeling less strong. Emotionally you have the potential for depression and melancholy. Take care of your health. Do not let things slide. Notice if you are moving from a place of sincerity and honesty. Breakdown may happen in relationships on an edge. Remember to depend upon yourself.

The Moon sextile Neptune. Each us us, grow from challenges. Intuition can combine with the mind and extraordinary things can manifest if you allow for the expansion of focus. Know that it is important to not exaggerate or dramatize situations. Too many things are on edge. Don’t add to any stress for another.

~Suzanne Wagner~


I want a world where values
and respect are taught
from a young age.
I want a world where those
with hateful and toxic wounding
are helped and given the skills
and tools available
so they can recognize
the dysfunction and
evolve past the damage.
It is essential to a sane
and safe society to protect
the young from
the wounds of the adults.
~Suzanne Wagner~


I am grateful (beyond belief) to my parents who made choices that allowed me to have an almost ideal childhood. Now, while my family is not perfect by any means, it did have some essential and critical ingredients that allowed me to grow and explore in ways that I was safe and protected.
My father was raised in Brooklyn and he was bound and determined to not allow his children to grow up in that environment. So we were raised in Texas with the wide open fields, horses, camping, swimming, lake house, ski boat, backpacking, picnics, etc. On many levels it was lovely. Much of the harshness and hate of the world was filtered out because we did not have so much social media or television. I remember getting to watch one television show a night. But many nights we were doing homework or playing in the creek.

As I have matured and spoken with so many people, I have been astounded at the numbers of people who had a much different childhood. One filled with abuse, hardship, and suffering. I recognized that was the norm in most people’s lives. And I am grateful that my childhood allowed me to have clear boundaries and respect for all of life.
My mother taught me that I could do and be anything I wanted but to know that I was going to have to work on it to achieve those goals. Hard work was a part of life and expected, if you were going to make anything of value in the world. I watched her be “Super Mom” and wondered if I would ever be a successful parent. Dinner was always on the table at 5:30 pm. House was clean and perfect. Clothes always laundered, folded, and put away. Chores were for everyone. No one was exempt from helping in the family. Rules were rules and were there to make things run smoothly and fairly. Now, they did not always feel fair but that was the intent and now, looking back it is clear that she did the best she knew how to with what she had available. And that is all anyone can ask. We were always tucked in at night. We were praised and loved. We were corrected and given responsibilities that were aligned with our abilities and age. She did an awesome job.
My father taught me that you deal with the situations that are handed to you. You don’t complain. You don’t whine. You don’t blame another for your actions and choices. And you tell the truth. Even if that truth puts you in a “less than” light. Honor and respect was earned and it could be earned even if you were young. Age had nothing to do with it. Being older did not give anyone, the right to treat others badly. He made it clear that many older people had never dealt with deeper emotional issues and that their judgment needed to be evaluated and challenged at times. That respect is given only when it is earned.
He taught me that you have to be compassionate to all. You have to learn to listen and allow others to speak. But what they say is never necessarily true, even if they believe it to be by that same person. He said that the older people got (if they did not deal with their own wounding), then that wounding was the basis of their beliefs, prejudices, and judgments. And that can never be trusted. I am grateful for that level of clarity and support. He was a man of great integrity and follow-through.
I tell all of you this to help you know what made a big difference in my life. One more toy, never made a difference. Getting my way all the time, never happened. Wanting things and earning things were two very different situations. Nothing was really handed to me.
Except love. Love was always freely given and offered.
Part of that has been a type of challenge that I have had to overcome as an adult. Because I never really allowed others to help me. Learning that it is a joy to others when they can help me has been a tremendous challenge and breakthrough.
My father said over and over again, “Never depend on anyone but yourself!”
But even with those blocks that I had to learn to overcome, I have never intentionally taken advantage of another person. I have never “expected” others to do it for me. I have never taken money from a person when I could feel that there were hooks or expectations. I have learned that being authentic is easier than being fake and putting up a façade of ego to protect my weaknesses. I have found admitting to mistakes and showing my weaknesses is a powerful skill that is rare and appreciated. I have learned that I do not hang out with those that will not admit to wrongdoing, because it takes too much energy to ignore the elephant in the room. I cannot abide those that live their life and project from a false self. I have tried again and again to give others the doorway to shift and become more authentic but I now recognize how few can actually do that.
I believe the goal in life is one of self-discovery. I believe that the only way out of this karmic trap is to fully be here as your most authentic self. I believe that the only way through karma is love and compassion. I believe that protecting the false self will never give you freedom. And I believe that everyone will eventually get home.

~Suzanne Wagner~


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